what do you bench?

The G-man likes asking this question. He likes answering it too. So, G-man, I was thinking about you when I was listening to the news anchors this morning talking about the president's state of health.

Just to give you something to work toward: Pres. Bush can bench 185. His body fat? It's just 15.79 percent. And he's 50 years old. G-man, you're only 30. Are you going to let him out beefcake you?

So no matter what happens, no matter what actions the president takes, we'll at least be able to say he's at the top of his game. And if you ever need to find him, just look in the gym; it's the new Oval Office.

And now for the beefcake:

Beefcake: Hey! You need to get in shape fast?!? Wanna look your best?!? Tired the other guys getting all the chicks?!? Are you tired of being a 90 pound weakling?!?
Cartman: Yeh, I only weight 90 pounds.
Beefcake: Then bulk up quick, with weight gain 4000!!
Cartman: Yes!
Beefcake: With over 4000 grams of saturated fat per serving, it's patented formula is designed to enter the mouth, and go to directly to the stomach where it is distributed to the bloodstream.
Beefcake: Now available in stores everywhere. Get some today, and say with me 'Beefcake!'
Cartman: Beefcake!
Beefcake: Beefcake!
Cartman: Beefcake!
Beefcake: Beefcake!
Cartman: Beefcake!!!
TV Announcer: May cause irreversible damage to the kidneys and liver.

Cartman: Eh, eh. Sweet. Check me out; I'm such a beefcake I can't even get through the door. Eh.

Geraldo: Is there anything you'd like to say to people out there?
Cartman: Follow your dreams; you can reach your goals. I'm living proof. Beefcake. Beefcake!